My mother recently reached a milestone birthday – 90 years. Unfortunately, she wasn’t able to really comprehend that. Like so many of the elderly, her body continues to be here even though her mind has moved on to other dimensions.
Strokes. One little brain explosion at a time has left their toll. I’ve lost count. We were talking on the phone when it happened the first time. She recovered completely from that one but another one happened which began the real decline. A few months later, she broke her hip and then Daddy died. Little by little she slipped away. Last year another stroke impacted her ability to swallow or speak. It was so bad, I asked for Hospice. Her speech was reduced to that of a 2 year old. Sometimes it is just gibberish, yet she is so physically expressive of her emotions, she makes her point known. Sometimes an entire sentence is clear and succinct. Sometimes it is just a word or two.
After a year of Hospice care, Mom graduated. Apparently she has no intention of leaving the planet yet!
Mom and I have had an interesting relationship. She’s been a difficult woman, to say the least. At times, my friends were a little frightened of her. She could go on a rant! As she lost her mind, her judgments and her negativity, we became very close. I was blessed to rediscover my mother.
When I last visited, I wasn’t sure if she would know me. Sometimes she forgets that I’ve grown up. When I approached her, she was sitting with a group of residents in the reception area. She looked up at me with clear recognition and absolute delight. The woman who had criticized me, yelled at me, accused me for most all my life; this woman was now bursting with joy at the mere sight of me.
Clearly and succinctly, she spoke to me. She said, “Daughter! Daughter! Beautiful! Love! Love!”
Precious words. There is great power in words. There is an even greater power in speaking words of love. I know my mother always loved me the very best way that she could. But she didn’t say it. She didn’t know how to say the words “I love you”. Don’t wait until you’re 90. Say precious words. Do it. While you can.