Oct 01 2017

Money. Money. Money.

Category: BeliefPatricia @ 2:25 pm

 

pennies from heaven

 

How do you feel about money? What’s your relationship like? We all have a relationship with money. A very intimate and personal relationship. It’s a relationship that started when you were very young. You were given money and you were told its value. You quickly learned the difference between a penny and a quarter. And even though the coins were fun to play with and to count, you soon learned that the paper money was worth more. You learned how to shop and how to spend. Maybe you compared how much money you had with how much money your sister, brother or friend had. Maybe you spent your money as soon as you got it or maybe you were taught to put it in your piggy bank to save it for a later date.

As a child, you heard your parents talking about money. A conversation may have been a joyful exchange about how much to spend on a new car or the cost of a vacation. Or the conversation could have been a heated argument about how there wasn’t enough money to pay the rent. Just like with everything else, you were programmed about money by your life experience. Mom and Dad, your extended family, your environment all had an influence about how you feel about money. And that influence extends to how you act with money. You were taught about what money means. You believed what you were told.

Maybe you learned, “you have to work hard for your money.” Or maybe you learned, “you need to make your money work for you.” Perhaps you learned that “money can’t buy happiness” or that “the rich are different”. Adam Smith, an economist, says, All money is a matter of belief.”

Our beliefs affect our actions. If you were raised in a family where there was little money, you learned about lack. You may have developed spending guilt. You may be afraid to spend your money, for fear that you will not have more. You may tell yourself that you can’t afford it. When this happens, you project feelings of “lack”. You may become miserly. When you are projecting this vibration of lack, you are also attracting more of it. The truth is, in order to manifest more money, you need to be projecting feelings of abundance, not lack! Even when you are spending the money, you need to feel good about doing it. You need to feel that you are worth it. There is a very widespread limiting belief about money that you have to save it in order to be prosperous. No one ever got rich by putting all their money into a savings account. Do you believe money is a limited resource?

Sometimes we are taught to use money to increase our status. Will Rogers said, Too many people spend money they earned…to buy things they don’t want…to impress people that they don’t like.”  How do you spend your money? Are you guilty of using your charge card to pay for lunch for the whole table even though you don’t have enough cash in your wallet to pay for your own meal? Do you spend more than you can afford to buy designer labels? It’s good to have money and it’s good to spend money. It’s also good to understand what you’re spending it on and why you’re spending it. Don’t resort to retail therapy. Make sure that you haven’t lost sight of the things that money can’t buy.

Money is merely an energy exchange. It’s a tool. You earn money for your time and talent…for the energy you put into your job. You can then use the money to exchange it for goods and services that you want and need. You exchange your energy with someone else so that you both will benefit. Money will take you wherever you want to go, but it is necessary for you to be the driver. I encourage you to say “Yes” to life. Spend the money on the things you want to do. Take the trip. Your prosperity beliefs were formed long ago. You didn’t have a choice. But you do have a choice now.

Know that as a soul on life’s journey, you have a destiny to fulfill. The Universe wants to support you. It wants you to succeed! Expect the best. Ask yourself, “what would my life be like, if money were no object?”  Imagine what you would do. Imagine how you would live. Imagine with intention. The Universe is responding to your thoughts…and the way you feel about your thoughts. Emotion is the fuel of creation. Tell yourself: “I am a money magnet.” “Money flows to me constantly.” “I am attracting cash and income from new and unexpected sources.” “I have all the money I need and more.” “I am worthy of abundance.”  It feels good to think those thoughts, doesn’t it?

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Sep 28 2017

Stop Whining

Category: ControlPatricia @ 12:53 pm

 

trash can.1

 

What’s your complaint? What annoys you? Who is doing things to you…making you feel angry or sad?  Are there obstacles standing in your way? Limitations? Problems that need solving?  Does your life suck? If it does suck, do you think that complaining about it is going to change it? Do you think anyone wants to listen to your complaints? Do you expect others to fix things for you? If they did fix it, would you be satisfied? Or would you complain that they didn’t do it right? No one is responsible for you except you. Figure out the solution to your problem.

Marcus Aurelius, the Roman emperor best known for his Meditations on Stoic philosophy, advises that we should deal with any obstacles quickly. Do this instead of wasting time complaining about the obstacle. He says, “A cucumber is bitter. Throw it away. There are briars in the road. Turn aside from them. This is enough. Do not add, ‘And why were such things made in the world?’”  In other words, deal with it. And move on.

Are you guilty of complaining? Or maybe you know someone who is skilled at whining or grumbling? Some of us spend a lot of time focusing on what we don’t like; don’t want and don’t need. We find solace in going over all the details of what is wrong and who is at fault.  This happens with individuals. It also happens within a relationship or a community. This negative and futile behavior is heightened when we are experiencing problems and differences in opinions about how to solve those problems. Asking why doesn’t help. Moaning about the way things are and wringing our hands in despair is never a solution to any problem.

With all situations in life, you must look at the solution…not the problem. If you know where you want to be, it’s easier to figure out how to get there. When focusing your attention on the solution, you are energetically aligned with the positive outcome. You can envision the successful accomplishment of your goal and know what steps you need to take to achieve it. You can imagine your future. You can imagine feeling better. You can take action. It is important to focus on what it is you want and why you want it. With that focus of intention, the who, when and where of what you want will fall into place. You don’t have to know all the answers right now. Einstein says, “When the solution is simple, God is answering.”

Experiencing life is a series of ups and downs; joys and sorrows. Bad things happen. There is no value to focusing on the bad things. Move on. Complaining will get you nowhere that you want to be. Whining is a waste of time. Throw away the cucumber. In the final analysis, it’s about how you respond to the bitterness; how you deal with the problem. It’s about what you intend to do right now that determines your future success. It’s always about now. It’s always about you.

 

 

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Sep 14 2017

Turning Mistakes Into Lessons

Category: Choices,Inspirational QuotesPatricia @ 12:03 pm

 

missed

 

We all make mistakes. It’s the way we learn. We try. We fail. We try again. Each time we do better because we know better. There is no need to regret your mistakes! Mistakes are not only tolerable, but are actually desirable. Einstein says, “Anyone who has never made a mistake has never tried anything new.”

I’m sure that you can recall a time when you made a mistake… a mistake that taught you something. Even though it may have been unpleasant, you learned something from the mistake. I want you to begin to appreciate the fact that without having made mistakes like that, you would have never learned and progressed. We learn more from doing things wrong than from doing things right. Mistakes have consequences. Sometimes those consequences are immediate. Other times, the consequences may take years to surface.

Your imperfect mistakes have been perfect opportunities for a wealth of learnings; an indispensable foundation to build on. So don’t be mistaken about mistakes; the more unpleasant it is, the more beneficial the lesson will be. Paulo Coelho says, You need to have sufficient courage to make mistakes. Disappointment, defeat, and despair are the tools God uses to show us the way.”

In order to turn your mistakes into lessons, it’s good to consider a few things. You need to consider the story you are telling yourself about the mistake. What role are you playing? Perpetrator? Victim? Hero?

 

This is what happened. Allow yourself to look at what occurred. Become an outside observer. Consider the factors leading up to the mistake. Consider what you believe happened. Consider the beliefs of others.


This is what I did.
Consider your actions and why you thought it was the right action at the time. Or maybe you knew it wasn’t the right action and you did it anyway. Consider why. Did you act consciously and mindfully? Did negative emotions affect your actions? Accept responsibility for your actions.


This has been the cost.
Consider the negative consequences of your actions. How were you affected? How were others affected? Was the cost too much to pay? Accept responsibility for the cost.


This is what I learned.
Consider your thoughts, beliefs and actions.  Understand why you did what you did. Look for the positive consequences of your new perspective. Accept yourself.


This is what I could do differently in the future.
Consider other choices you could have made. Consider the beliefs that led up to the choice that led to a mistake. Acknowledge your ability to respond in different ways and to make better choices in similar circumstances.

 

I’d like you to consider the benefit of having the courage to be imperfect. Human beings are not perfect. It really is all right to be human… and to make some mistakes…so that you can learn and grow. Make amazing mistakes, fantastic and interesting mistakes. Just do the best you can do.

 

 

 

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Aug 01 2017

Behaving As If

Category: ChoicesPatricia @ 10:30 am

ballerina

 

Do you have a role model? Perhaps you act as a role model for someone else? In some way, we are all role models to each other. Reflections. Good and bad illustrations of how to be. Since there is no reason to focus on a bad example, let’s focus on the good aspects of a role model. A good role model is always positive and confident in themselves and their abilities. A good role model is happy and grateful for their achievements, yet continues to strive for more. A role model serves as an example. Albert Einstein says, “Setting an example is not the main means of influencing others; it is the only means.”

When you are confronted with a challenge in your own life, consider asking yourself, “What would my role model do?” Observe how they approach problems or situations which are similar to your own personal dilemmas. Find out how they achieved their goals and what they would do differently if they were starting over. Use their example. Heed their advice. Pay attention to the qualities of their presence and demeanor. Are they decisive? Calm? In control? Do they seek the advice of others? Are they confident in their abilities? Do they avoid mediocrity and make great efforts for excellence? Act as if you are the same. And you will become that.

Your thoughts, words and actions influence people every moment of the day. They also influence you! Choose to be positive in your approach to life. Walk your talk – be consistent with your words and your actions. As Theodore Roosevelt said, “I care not what others think of what I do, but I care very much about what I think of what I do! That is character!”  That is also integrity. A good role model is honest and trustworthy even when no one is watching.

By demonstrating good behavior, you deliver a strong message to others every day. This message is delivered when you accept responsibility for your actions. It is also delivered when you hold others accountable for their bad behavior and speak up when you need to do so. You influence others. When you follow the Ethics of Reciprocity, which is also known as the Golden Rule of “do unto others as you would have them do unto you” (Matt. 7:12), you create a connection. Almost all organized religions, philosophical systems, and secular systems of morality include such an ethic. Eric Allenbaugh reminds us of this when he says, “You are in charge of your feelings, beliefs, and actions. And you teach others how to behave toward you. While you cannot change other people, you can influence them through your own behaviors and actions. By being a living role model of what you want to receive from others, you create more of what you want in your life.”  You also attract people of like character and integrity.

Listen to your conscience.  You know what to do. Everyone will benefit.

 

 

 

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Jun 26 2017

Just One Thing

Category: Control,Inspirational QuotesPatricia @ 4:29 pm

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So maybe life isn’t going as you expected. The year is half over and those New Year’s resolutions have not panned out. Maybe you regret what you’ve done or maybe you regret what you didn’t do. Maybe that job you were hoping for didn’t come through. You didn’t even get the rejection call from the employer. Or maybe that man you’ve been dating did make the rejection call. Maybe you can’t pay your rent and you don’t know what to do next. Any one of those things can send us into a feeling of overwhelm or panic. We look for answers. We ask, “how did this happen?” We consider all the things we did wrong. We determine many ways to blame. We think of all the ways we may be able to fix the situation. And sometimes we can’t think of any way at all. When this happens, we experience “analysis paralysis.” And then nothing happens. We can’t take action. Our analysis of the situation has literally paralyzed our ability to act.

When we experience regrets about what we could have done; should have done; or what would happen if we had done…we dwell on all the negative aspects of the situation. We focus on everything we perceive to have done wrong. We judge ourselves and others. We assign responsibility for the situation. CouldaShouldaWoulda World is not a place you want to visit! Remember you did what you did with what you knew at the time. You made choices. Your life is a reflection of your choices.

We would all be better served if we chose to concentrate our efforts on changing just one aspect of our thoughts and actions. When we spend our time thinking about all the things that we need to change, it’s impossible to focus on taking constructive action on just one thing. When we focus, everything is much easier to accomplish.

You don’t need to address everything at once…you just need to focus on one thing! And do you know what that one thing is? The one thing you can do to influence your outside world…is to go within and to focus on what you want! This one thing is the most powerful and influential thing you can do. Ralph Waldo Emerson says, “Do the thing and you will have the Power.”

We all have the ability to do the thing. You are born with an imagination and desire. You have gifts, skills, talents and abilities. It’s an inside thing. Using your ability to visualize, imagine, pretend and experience, you create your life. You determine what you want. You have the ability to make the choices to create the actions which bring the experience into your reality.

Stop analyzing what you are doing wrong. Let go of the regrets. Kiss the blame goodbye. And begin again in this moment. Remember the only time there will ever be is this now moment. Now go within. Focus. Do the thing.

 

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May 23 2017

Dream A Little Dream

Category: Choices,MotivationPatricia @ 8:56 am

424

 

In the magical state of creation (where you spend every moment of your life, whether you are aware of it or not), the economic exchange is affected by different rules. The dream state operates on another level. The only currency is energy. And the only price to be paid is with your imagination – your thought energy. You may not have cash flow, but you always have an unlimited supply of imagination. The state of creation does not follow the same order as the U.S. economy. There is plenty for everyone. You can have it all. Or you can choose to have nothing at all. It’s a choice we make based on the focus of our thoughts…what we think about; what we believe about what we think; how we feel about what we think.

So, considering you can afford the life of your dreams, what are you dreaming? Everyone has thoughts and dreams of a better life. No matter how good life is, it can always be better. Consider the thoughts which bring a smile to your face. Or the ones which make your belly tingle with excitement. And then think the thoughts which make your heart happy. These thoughts can make you feel like a million bucks! Or even more!

Take a moment out of your everyday life and give yourself a little dream time. You deserve it. You can afford it! And you really can’t afford not to do it! There are twenty-four hours in the day. Surely, your dreams are worth as little as a measly fifteen minutes!

Play a little game. A dreaming game. Begin by setting your intention. Make sure that your intention is set in a way that is best for all concerned. Then simply write out this sentence:

“Even though I don’t know how this will happen, I am grateful because it is now (fill in a date) and I am (enjoying, looking at, experiencing, earning, etc.) my (new salary of $xxx, new home, new car, vacation, etc.) and I feel _____________.”

When you consider this sentence, pay close attention to how the dream thought makes you feel. Emotions are very, very important in the state of creation. Emotions are the fuel which fire up and feed your dream. Thought creates emotion which creates action. When you play the dreaming game, make the fire bigger by thinking about different aspects of your success. For example, if you’re dreaming of a new car, fill in all the details. Make a list of the car’s features and why you like them. Think about the value of independence and mobility that a car offers. Consider how you will feel when you are driving this new car and the places you will go. Step outside of yourself, and see yourself having the experience of a new car. And then feel the gratitude for your ability to create this experience. As you fill in all the details, your imagination is free to dream big. Your dream creates passion.

When dreaming, you know that anything can happen. Even impossible things. You are now dreaming.

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Mar 28 2017

Impossible? What Do You Think?

Category: BeliefPatricia @ 12:03 pm

chris bertish.1

 

Chris Bertish made history this month. One day at a time. One stroke at a time. He did what many would consider impossible. Chris Bertish, a world champion big wave surfer from South Africa, recently completed a trans-Atlantic journey on a 20-foot stand-up paddleboard. Yes, that’s right. On a paddleboard. Across the Atlantic Ocean. Alone. He made the decision. He made the plan. He believed it was possible. And then he did it…through the power of his own mind, through the power of his own thoughts.

Bertish made the journey as a way to raise money for charity and test the limits of possibility. His motto is “Dream it, See it, Believe it, Achieve it.” The Lunchbox Fund, Operation Smile, and Signature of Hope were the three main beneficiaries of the reported $6 million raised by this amazing journey. When we are inspired to do for others, we are fueled by more power and determination. The goal becomes bigger than the individual. Success matters more.

The journey from Morocco’s Agadir Harbor, to Antigua’s English Harbor took ninety three days. It is estimated that to travel the distance of 4,050 miles, 2,088,000 paddle strokes were required. To do this, it was necessary to consume 8,000-10,000 calories per day. The average distance traveled every day was 44 miles. More than a marathon. Every day. For ninety three days.

Bertish said, “This whole project is about breaking boundaries and redefining what is possible. Ninety-five percent of the world thought it was impossible. The words ‘impossible’ and ‘can’t’ are motivators for me to find solutions, get creative and make the impossible possible.” You decide what is possible in your life. You decide what your limits are. And it is your choice to break those limits. Anything is possible if you believe it is possible.

As you can imagine, there were challenges along the way. More than a dozen things broke and needed to be jury-rigged. And remember the repairs needed to be done in treacherous conditions, including a couple of close encounters with sharks and 20-foot seas. One of the biggest challenges came when the solar panels which allowed him to make fresh drinking water stopped working properly. Unable to make the three gallons of water needed to survive on a daily basis, he said “I had to train my body to survive on a gallon to a gallon and a half of water each day. That way, I could manage the other systems that would keep me alive, like powering the automatic identification systems so giant tankers could see me and wouldn’t run me over in the middle of the night.”  The body is a reflection of your subconscious mind. Through mindfulness and meditative thought you can cause changes in your body functions, when you believe you can.

In the 1980’s, Dr. Herbert Benson did studies on the mind-body connection. His research showed that highly trained Tibetan monks were able to control their body temperature by using the power of their mind.  Through deep concentration, the monks were able to generate enough heat that they were able to dry wet blankets with their body heat. The meditating monks could increase the temperature of their fingers and toes by as much as 46.94 °F.  Like the Tibetan monks, Indian yogis are also able to manipulate their physiological processes. Research done in 1936 showed that yogis were able to slow their heart rate down so slow that it was only detectable with an EKG. And of course you are aware of the placebo effect. It is so widely accepted as fact that most medical tests use it as a way of proving if a drug works on its own or because people “think” it works. If we think it works, it does. Our body responds physiologically, producing real biological effects, as a reaction to a belief or an inert substance. An amusing study was done by a group of Princeton students. The experimenters served non-alcoholic O’Douls at a keg party then watched as their guests acted as if they were drinking regular beer. Generally behaving as if they were drunk, they acted silly, slurred their words and staggered around. Their belief affected their body’s reactions and their behavior. Bertish reinforces this when he says, “What I find fascinating about adventure is it teaches you about your limits and shows you that you can push your body to overcome things that most people think aren’t humanly possible. It makes you realize how incredible the human body is if you teach it to do something and shift the normality of what it’s expected to do.”

There were multiple life-threatening low-points, “where it was about having the right mental attitude to stay strong and not fall apart and just endure every hour, every day, every night … night after night, stroke after stroke, for 93 days straight’. Bertish says, “How did I get through it? It was all about going stroke-by-stroke, just getting through the next hour, the next day, the next night, the next storm. If you stay focused on what is happening right in front of you and never give up, you’ll eventually make it to your goal.” Success happens when you stay in the now moment. We can not be present and aware if we are thinking about something that happened in the past or what might happen in the future. The now moment is the moment of power…the moment of creation.

So is there something “impossible” that you would like to accomplish? What’s your excuse? What do you need to motivate yourself? Perhaps there is a charity worth your support. Perhaps there is challenge you want to give to yourself. What are your limits? Who created them? There are no limits. There are only limited thoughts. Chris Bertish has decided to embrace “limitless living. We can achieve, explore and do anything we want in life.” I congratulate and applaud Chris Bertish on this amazing achievement; not only for his own personal goal, but for the recipients of his charitable giving.  He is absolute proof that The Mind Matters!!!

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

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Jan 30 2017

Negative Thoughts Can Create Positive Results

Category: Choices,MotivationPatricia @ 2:47 pm

tao

 

There is duality in the universe; light and darkness, heat and cold. This duality is reflected in our emotions. Like emotions, energy also comes in two forms: positive and negative. Each has its own distinct vibration. I often encourage my clients to focus on the positive aspects of their lives…to think of what they want. When we are thinking positive thoughts we feel positive feelings. We like that. When we are thinking negative thoughts we don’t like how we feel. We feel uncomfortable. But sometimes negative thoughts can bring positive results. Sometimes negative energy can create positive change.

If you want to get in shape, you can think about all the positive reasons to do that. You can think about how you’ll have more energy; your clothes will fit better; you’ll feel good about yourself. All those positive thoughts can motivate you to take the actions necessary to succeed. You can reinforce those thoughts by writing them down. When we write things down, it solidifies our commitment to our goal. We are more likely to be successful. When we give our subconscious mind visual reminders of our goals, it creates more reinforcement. Pictures and illustrations are guides for our goal-achieving machine. Both words and visual reminders add fuel to the fire. When you think about your success, you are motivated to take the steps to achieve it. You connect with the positive results and your belief that you can succeed.

Now, I’d like you to consider several reasons why you don’t want to be out of shape. You could think about the health consequences of high blood pressure or diabetes or heart disease or any other grim reality that can result from being out of shape. You could consider how you’re not able to enjoy physical activities; suffering from erectile dysfunction or sleep apnea. You could realize that your longevity is being affected; you could die sooner and miss out on precious time with loved ones. You could accept the negative consequences… or you can use your fear of these things to drive you to do something to prevent them from happening! Fear can be a powerful force for motivation. Fear helps you connect with your power to take control to avoid the negative consequences.

Using both positive and negative energy together can be the key to your success. The powerful momentum fueled by your positive thoughts and desires combined with the fear of negative consequences can create amazing results! When you are confronted by the thoughts of a future you do not want to experience, you are motivated to make the changes necessary so that it will not come to pass. Often we have to confront our worse fears before we are able to find the strength and willpower to do what is right for us. Embrace the darkness. Move into the light.

 

 

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Jan 19 2017

No Expiration Date. No Time Limit. No Other Life.

Category: Choices,Inspirational Quotes,MotivationPatricia @ 12:49 pm

grandma moses

 

Later in life, some of us experience regret about what we didn’t accomplish. We didn’t achieve what we wanted. We didn’t fulfill our true potential. We didn’t travel the world. We didn’t find our soul mate. We didn’t learn to play the piano. These “didn’ts” can cause pain. They can make us feel as if we had failed at life.

The ability to do new things and learn new skills does not expire. We can always improve and become better versions of ourselves. My dad passed away at the age of 93. One of the many things he taught me was that you could do anything you set your mind to do; you could learn anything. And there were no limits as to when you could begin. When he was 75, he decided to learn how to paint with oils. So he got an easel, some canvases and paints. And then he painted.  When he was 88, he invested in a computer so that he could learn about the internet. And then he explored the new world of cyberspace.

Almost without exception, some of the regret experienced later in life is a result of not “achieving” something. When one feels that they haven’t fulfilled their true potential, it can leave a painful mark. Self-discovery and improvement can happen at any time in life. The ability to improve oneself does not expire. It is a never-ending process.

“You must live in the present, launch yourself on every wave, find your eternity in each moment. Fools stand on their island of opportunities and look toward another island. There is no other land; there is no other life but this.” – Henry David Thoreau

There are many stories of people who began new careers at an advanced age. One such person is Anna Mary Robertson, known as Grandma Moses. She began her painting career at the age of 78 (I think maybe Dad was inspired by her) and painted until her passing at the age of 101.

There is also a lesser known woman who should be acknowledged: Doreetha Daniels. Doreetha, a multiple stroke victim with vision and hearing problems recently received her college degree from College of the Canyons in Santa Clara, California. Doreetha is 99 years old. She advised prospective students: “Don’t give up. Do it. Don’t let anybody discourage you. Say that, ‘I’m going to do it,’ and do it for yourself.”

One faculty member said: “Doreetha is a living testament to the saying ‘if there is a will, there is a way’…” Doreetha was motivated to go to college by two things. She was tired of her hobbies and wanted to expand her interests. And she was inspired by her grandchildren, who after starting families and careers, went back to school for graduate degrees.

Consider Thoreau’s words …“there is no other life but this.” Take the opportunity to live it to the fullest. Live until the very end. There is no limitation to what you can accomplish. There is no time limit to being actively engaged in life.

 

 

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Nov 24 2016

Direct the Dream

 

3rd eye thought

 

Even if you don’t play golf, you have probably heard of Jack Nicklaus, the professional golfer who is nicknamed The Golden Bear. He is widely regarded as the greatest golfer of all time, having won a total of 18 major championships during the past 25 years.

And whether you play golf or not, you can benefit from one of the techniques Jack Nicklaus used to become such a great golfer. Obviously, Nicklaus has certain athletic abilities which he has refined and developed. He has done the physical work to become great. He has also done the mental work. Not only has he used his subconscious mind to stay focused and visualize the desired outcome, he has used his subconscious as a sports clinic. There is a story told about a dream he had when he was not performing well. When he analyzed the dream he figured out why his game was off. He had a dream where he was really owning the links; playing better than he had in a long while. After analysis, the champ realized that in the dream, he was gripping his club differently than he was doing in real life. He said, “I tried it the way I did in my dream and it worked. I feel kind of foolish admitting it, but it really happened in a dream.”

Your subconscious mind knows more than your conscious mind. You can trust it to guide and direct you. Besides, it’s going to do it even if you don’t trust it! Your subconscious mind is the 88% of your mind that is directing your motivation and behavior. It is also your goal-achieving machine. Your subconscious mind speaks to you in images. You can also speak to and direct your subconscious mind through images.

Dr. Denis Waitley has done studies where athletes are connected to a biofeedback machine during visualization. When they imagine going through a practice or performance, the studies show that the same muscles are engaged as if they were actually doing the exercise. Remember, the mind doesn’t know the difference between what you imagine and what you perceive as reality. Using hypnosis, guided imagery and visualization trains the mind to achieve automatic reactions and responses. When doing this, all senses are engaged. Effective visualization uses sight, sound, taste, touch and emotion. This can give an athlete (or anyone!!!) a renewed level of self- confidence.

The meditative state which is achieved by self-hypnosis allows one to give instructional self-talk to improve specific techniques or skills, athletic or otherwise. Well-known sports figures Kobe Bryant, LeBron James and Tiger Woods all have meditation practices. Tell yourself, “Keep your knees bent.” “Chin up.” “You can do it.” According to sports psychologist Antonis Hatzigeorgiadis, “The mind guides action. If we succeed in regulating our thoughts, then this will help our behavior.”

When Jack Nicklaus had his dream, he trusted himself and his own inner guidance. He acted on his inner wisdom. When you go within, (whether in the dream state, the meditative state, the hypnotic state, whatever you want to name it state) you transcend conscious thought. You achieve a heightened state of focused concentration, effortless calm and confidence. You let go of the outside reality as you know it. This state of mind keeps pressures and distractions from harming you. When you go within, you know everything. This is the beginning of dreaming and from this point you can direct the dream. Trust yourself. Believe in your dreams.

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Nov 14 2016

Four Great Questions

Category: ChoicesPatricia @ 12:02 pm

 

gregory

 

How do you begin your day? Many of us have morning rituals that help (or hurt) our productivity and peace of mind. Depending on your circumstances, you may not have a lot of time to focus on any rituals. You may not have the time to focus at all. You may be rushing off to work or getting the kids ready for school. But what if you did have the time for a little morning contemplation? If it’s possible (remember all things are possible if you believe) you may want to create a daily practice which was suggested by someone who lived long ago in what you may think of as less hectic than modern times. After all, our ancestors did not have as many outside influences on their time. Their world was smaller and quieter than ours but they had their own challenges to overcome.

Pope Saint Gregory I (c. 540 – 12 March 604), commonly known as Saint Gregory the Great, was a pope of the Catholic Church. You may be familiar with Gregorian chants from that era. Gregory the Great suggested a daily practice which he believed would help people to be more effective in life. He encouraged people to take a moment each morning to be mindful and to ask  four questions of themselves.

 

  1. Where are you? In other words, what is the state of your life? How is your health; relationships; financial well-being?
  1. Where are you not? How do you relate to the perfect version of you? What is missing? What parts of your life need attention?
  1. Where have you been? Consider your spiritual progress and understanding based on your past life experiences. What have you learned about what you want and what you don’t want?
  1. Where will you be one day? Envision your heaven; your ideal self living your ideal life. Consider your future, for as Gregory explains, you will receive it if you want it.

 

When you take a moment to go within, you are better able to see what is affecting your life from the outside. In considering where you are in life, you are able to reinforce the positive aspects of your being. When considering where you are not, you are able to become aware of what is missing or less than what you want. Thinking about where you have been allows you to look back and see from a different perspective. It also allows you to feel gratitude for your experiences. It gives you strength and builds your confidence. Planning for the future is a way to have a little preview of life’s coming attractions. When you visualize what you want, you become emotionally connected to the positive outcome you anticipate. Visualization directs the power of your subconscious mind, your goal-achieving machine. You’re more likely to be successful.

Perhaps you don’t have the time to be mindful of these things every day. But maybe you could do it once a week or once or month. Or at least do it once!!! You’re worth the time and effort and it really could make a difference in your life.

 

 

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Oct 17 2016

Plan Backwards

Category: Choices,Control,Health & Wellness,Motivation,Weight ManagementPatricia @ 11:39 am

plan-backwards

 

 

When we set a goal, we think about it as a future event, situation or experience. We set a date. It is something in the distance…a destination at the end of a journey. One way to move forward to meet a big goal is to plan backwards.

When your goal is complex or requires the passage of time for completion, you need to break it down into more “doable” goals. A doable goal requires less time to see the results. It’s important to recognize the successful completion of every step along the way to your success. Remember, there is no express elevator to achieving success. You have to take one step at a time. Recognizing your progress helps to motivate you to continue. You have the end in sight. Setting up step by step goals can also help you to be more aware and conscious of any changes or deviations that need to be made.

Let’s say you want to lose 20 pounds for an event that is three months away. Obviously, this is not a goal you can achieve in a weekend. In order to lose the 20 pounds, you need to start planning backwards to break the goal down into little, easily achievable goals. Imagine that you want to lose 2 pounds every week. This is a doable goal. To lose 2 pounds, you need to cut your caloric intake or increase your caloric burn. It requires 3500 extra calories to gain a pound, which means that it would take 7000 less calories to lose those 2 pounds. If you break that down, you see that you need to eliminate 1000 calories each day to achieve your goal. This is a doable goal. Many people eat 3 meals and at least 2 snacks every day. If you decrease your intake each time you eat by just 200 calories, you’ve done it! You have successfully taken a big, overwhelming goal and you divided it into very small, achievable goals. You are able to achieve a small goal multiple times during the day. When you check your weight after seven days, you are able to celebrate your success. If you did not lose the anticipated 2 pounds, you are able to make an adjustment to insure your success next week. You keep your end goal in mind.

When you commit to your success, you will be able to achieve your goal in just 10 weeks!!! You might want to consider beginning this goal right now. There will be no need for New Year’s resolutions. You will be happily dancing your way into the New Year weighing 20 pounds less than you do right now!

Planning backwards helps you to move forward for all kinds of big goals. Consider a big goal you may have. Perhaps you want to take that dream vacation or buy a new car. Begin saving today. If it’s a goal, you will find a way to take action. If you can’t find a way, than it is not a goal… it’s just a wish. And after time, it may become a regret.

Make a commitment to your goal. Take the first step to succeed in your plan. Keep your goal in mind and follow the steps backwards until you have reached the beginning, which is where you are right now. Get excited about what you plan to accomplish because without excitement and enthusiasm, you’ll lose sight of your plan and you won’t move forward. You can do it!

 

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Sep 26 2016

More Confident in 3 Easy Steps

Category: Belief,ChoicesPatricia @ 10:09 am

 

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Do you know what it means to feel confident with yourself? To be comfortable with your actions? To feel as if you are in control? Everybody can learn to be more confident. It begins with telling yourself that you can be.

When you are confident you can remain “calm, cool and collected”. Being confident in yourself allows you to relax in stressful and challenging situations. When you are uncertain about the outcome and can still remain in control of your emotions and reactions, you can do anything. Confidence is the opposite of doubt.

Being confident is an attitude you choose. It is a response to outside influences and other opinions. What other people think of you is really not your business. It doesn’t matter. And you’re probably making it up anyway. When you are confident you are not concerned about what others think of you.

You can be confident about many things – tying your shoes, using a hammer. But maybe you’re not confident about public speaking. Confidence in specific situations is what really matters. When you use the power of your imagination to think about how you will be successful in what you want in life, you build your self-confidence in that area. The mind doesn’t know the difference in what you perceive to be reality and what you imagine. And when you focus on what you want, your subconscious mind (your goal-achieving machine) will get busy on the task of making it happen. Your subconscious mind is patiently waiting for your conscious mind to set a direction.

Here are three simple strategies to help you to be more confident.

  1. Imagine the specific situation where you want to feel confident in the future. Imagine yourself as the best you. See yourself with loving eyes. Accept yourself for who you are.
  2. Focus on the emotions you want to feel in that situation. Perhaps think about feeling calm, relaxed and at peace with yourself. Give your subconscious mind specific instructions about how to respond.
  3. Allow yourself to get into a relaxed state and begin to visualize, imagine, pretend and experience the future you want to create. Use all your senses to make it more real to you. Set the blueprint for your subconscious mind. Create the belief in your success.

What you tell yourself matters. What you tell yourself ultimately determines what you are and are not able to do. So, even if it’s difficult, tell yourself you’ll be able to do it. And you will find that you can and you will… by the power of your own thoughts…the power of your mind.

 

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Aug 09 2016

Learning to Try

Category: MotivationPatricia @ 11:56 am

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Have you failed at something? Of course you have! Everyone fails! But a failure is really just another opportunity to succeed. Which is worse… failing or never trying? When we experience failure, we may feel stupid or embarrassed. We may even feel worthless and ashamed. We may be afraid to admit that we have failed in achieving our goal. Failure feels bad. It hurts. Failure makes us feel afraid to begin again. It creates self-doubt. Yet, just as we all experience failure, we all have experienced starting over. We try again. We make another attempt or effort. We give it our best shot. And if we don’t try…we regret and we wonder “what if” or “if only”. Not trying may feel worse than failure.

Before you decide to start a new project after you have experienced failure, you need to evaluate what went wrong. You have to decide how you’ll do things differently. In order to do better, consider these three questions. They can change your perception of your failure and motivate you to try to succeed.

“How can my past experiences help me?”

“What can I learn from doing this project?”

“What are some mistakes I might make?” Remember – it’s ok to make mistakes!

Instead of thinking of yourself as a failure…think of yourself as a learner. A learner has to have a willingness to fail. When you stop trying to be a perfectionist or an expert and become a learner, you grow. You become more equipped to face challenging situations. You think more creatively. You give yourself more choices.

Your brain/mind is kind of like a muscle. It can grow and learn to do new things. Do something challenging. Go out of your comfort zone. Begin thinking in new ways. Scrabble, crossword puzzles, new recipes can all stimulate your mind to find new solutions.

Stop procrastinating. It is the enemy of learning and creativity. If you have a habit of putting tasks off, maybe it’s because you expect perfect results from yourself; you expect perfection from others; or you think others expect perfection from you. Where did you get these ideas? When you take on your work before a deadline, you take control of the problem. You give yourself a break from the stress. When you’re not stressed out about time limits, you are more able to think clearly. You give yourself time to experiment with new ideas and concepts. You encourage and stimulate the learner. You are capable of learning whatever you need to know.

Learners have possibilities. Every failure or mistake is just one step closer to success. Failures become insights and invite celebration rather than dismay. Failure does not define you as a person. You failed at an action; performing a particular task. That’s all. No big deal. You learned from it. Get over it and move on. Tell yourself it’s okay to make a mistake. Everybody makes mistakes! Stop judging yourself by impossible expectations.

It’s worth a try. And a try again. Make an effort to learn to succeed. You only fail when you don’t try.

 

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Jul 26 2016

The Dreaded Deadline

Category: BeliefPatricia @ 10:32 am

 

time travels on

 

We all have experienced deadlines over which we have no control. We have to pay our taxes by April 15. We need to renew our driver’s license or car registration. We have to take an exam or submit an application. We need to prepare a report or presentation. We need to pay our bills. Deadlines.  The word itself sounds kind of ominous. And rightly so. Are you aware that the term “deadline” originated in prison camps during the American Civil War? It referred to a physical line or boundary. Any prisoner who crossed the line would risk death. Guards were ordered to shoot to kill.  Later the term deadline came to be used by newspapers as a “time limit” in order to get the latest news printed and distributed on time. Fortunately for all of us, a deadline is no longer a life or death situation. Sometimes it may feel that way, but it’s not! You can take control of the deadlines in your life.

Often we create our own deadlines. Perhaps you’re planning to get married soon and planning the event. Or maybe you’ve bought a new house and need to move. You’ve just created a deadline. And somewhere along your life, you have been programmed to respond to deadlines in a particular way. Even if it’s not a good way, it’s a way that you know. We’re more comfortable with familiar. It’s less painful than doing something differently. Doing things differently requires conscious and mindful thought. We often run on autopilot. Our subconscious mind repeatedly performing tasks in the same way over and over again. Some of us created a habit of staying up all night cramming before an exam. Or we wait until the last minute to get things done. We create a time limit which restricts our abilities to perform at the highest level. We make unnecessary stress for ourselves and often make life stressful for those around us. We create a situation where we are unable to do our best.

Everyone can be more successful in dealing with deadlines by taking control. Do you wait until April 15 to file your taxes? There are many opportunities to do it sooner. Why not do it? Make yourself a deadline of March 15. If you have less time to complete the task, you most likely will increase your focus and your effort to get it done. Are you aware of Parkinson’s Law? Parkinson’s Law states that “work expands so as to fill the time available for its completion”.

Consider this. How tidy can you make your house when a friend calls and says they’ll stop by in 20 minutes? Or how quickly can you leave for the airport when you’ve overslept? How much can you accomplish and how fast can you do it?  You will notice that your effort significantly increases when your time is limited.

When you give yourself deadlines, you help yourself to achieve your goals. You become the boss of your life. As you think about your life and your daily schedule, it can help to use Parkinson’s Law to your advantage. A simple way to do this is to break your task into smaller goals. If you have a project that you estimate will take three hours, use 55 minute time blocks. Work steadily for 55 minutes and then take a 5 minute break. You will feel at ease because you have allowed yourself time to take a break and refocus your attention. The mini mental breaks energize you and make you more productive.  And do it again and again. Within your three hours, you have pushed yourself to success. Knowing your time is limited will help you to be more effective. You may find that with concentration and focus, your project is completed in less time than you had anticipated.

When you create a new way of doing things…when you realize your effort has influenced your success…you are more likely to repeat the process. By repeating the process, you are programming yourself to react to life the way you want. And you feel more in control. There is nothing to fear. You can relax knowing that no one is going to shoot you. You can use the deadline of a time limit as inspiration. When you cross the line, you have been successful in completing your goal.

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Jul 21 2016

Resolutions Not Regrets

Category: BeliefPatricia @ 4:41 pm

 

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“I don’t regret the things I’ve done, I regret the things I didn’t do when I had the chance.” ~Unknown

In the final stages of life, people often feel regrets. There are many similarities between the regrets of the dying and the regrets of the living. We seldom get second chances. Do-overs are rare. Instead of having regrets about the things you haven’t done (yet), make a conscious resolution to do them. Before it’s too late. Give yourself that second chance. Don’t wait to get it. If you have regrets about the past, now is the time to change that. You can do things differently starting now. You don’t have to wait until you think you’re dying. Fulfill your wishes.

Do you wish you had experienced more of what life has to offer? Have you had the experience of traveling to different parts of the country or the world? Have you enjoyed exploring new sensations that travel offers? From now on, do it!  Travel while you can. Step into the unknown. Expand your horizons. Embrace more new and exotic adventures.

Do you wish you had listened more to the good advice of others who know more than you do? Do you wish you had made different choices about what you ate and how much you ate; how often you exercised or were physically active? Do you regret the condition of your health and the physical state of your body? Listen now. Make the changes which will bring you the results you will not regret. Your body is a miraculous machine capable of healing itself and creating a new and improved version of you.

Do you wish you had stepped out of your comfort zone and faced your fears? Do you regret not taking a risk and being too cautious? Have you pushed yourself to the limits of your abilities? Or have your beliefs stood in your way? Not trying is worse than failing! Resolve to let go of your fears and perceived limitations. It’s an inside job. No one else can do it for you. Believe in yourself.

Do you wish you had spoken up more about what is important to you…what really matters? Have you voiced your opinions and stood up for your values and beliefs? Do you regret years spent keeping quiet while you suffer in an unhappy relationship? Do you regret the less than successful path your career has taken? If it is important to you, speak up now. Your truth is more valuable than the false harmony that is created by your silence. Allow yourself to speak your truth.

Do you wish you had done something sooner…rather than procrastinating about doing it? We miss out when we do that. We also pick up a few negative emotions like guilt and shame and embarrassment. And we can add regret for those opportunities that are forever lost. Taking action can be very difficult and scary. We need to be prepared for the results of our actions. Now is the time to start. Just do it! Make a plan and execute it. You’ll add positive emotions like pride, courage, confidence and a feeling of accomplishment.

Take the advice of the dying as a reflection of what could have been. Listen to those who have suffered through extreme trauma or illness and rehabilitation to learn to live again. Stop focusing on regrets and start focusing on resolutions. Pay attention to this simple advice. Experience all that life has to offer. Listen. Believe in yourself. Speak up. Don’t wait. Do it now! And I must add this: Love. Love yourself. Love others. Love deeply. Love freely. Love makes all the other stuff worthwhile.

 

 

 

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Jul 05 2016

Afraid Of A Frog

Category: Fears & PhobiasPatricia @ 11:31 am

 

 

 

frog

 

Mark Twain was a wise man who gave advice in a colorful yet simple way. One thing many of us need advice about is how to conquer our fears. The little every day fears. The ones that creep into your head first thing in the morning when you wake. Those things left undone; or unsaid. Those tasks that you may not want to do. The ones that make you feel uncomfortable or doubtful. Or the ones that seem too big to handle. Maybe it’s something that needs to be done at home. Maybe it’s a work thing. Maybe it’s something you need to do for yourself. Most of us procrastinate because it scares us or overwhelms us. It’s just too hard to deal with it. We don’t know how to start. Mark Twain tells us, “Eat a live frog first thing every morning, and nothing worse will happen to you the rest of the day.”

Eating a live frog is disgusting and YUCKY!!! I can’t imagine anyone enjoying that! But Twain was not being literal. The frog is your task. The yucky task. The one that needs your attention. But maybe the task is not yucky. Maybe it’s your thinking that is making it feel that way. Maybe the results of finishing the task are wonderful!

When you procrastinate eating your frog, you create a new set of problems. It’s impossible to concentrate on other things. You’re distracted. You can only think about the frog you need to eat later. Besides, when you put things off, you give yourself time to imagine every possible thing that could go wrong. You focus on the difficulty. You resent the time you need to spend on eating the frog. You want fast food! And now the frog seems bigger and more complicated. You may begin to resent the frog and everyone connected to it. You are focusing on what you don’t want!

When you eat the frog early in the day you gain a sense of accomplishment. You take care of what you want. You feel proud of yourself for having done that. It’s a great way to start the day feeling successful. Finishing that necessary task gives you the momentum you need to do other things. Everything is easy compared to the dreaded frog. Take care of the priority. Allow yourself to feel all the positive emotions connected to accomplishing the task. Confident, successful, happy. You may feel lighter after having let go of the burden you have been carrying.

Frogs can get very heavy and cumbersome. They can become difficult to handle and weigh you down. Have the courage to eat the frog. Even if it’s scary, get the yucky stuff over with and move on. Feel the satisfaction of having conquered your fears. And recognize that you always have the power and the control to focus on what you want, not on what you don’t want. And then enjoy the rest of the day!

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May 29 2016

Commencement Day

Category: ChoicesPatricia @ 8:31 am

graduation

 

Graduation season is upon us. The school year is almost finished. Ceremonies have begun to take place where degrees or diplomas are being awarded to students. Even pre-schools hold graduation ceremonies complete with tiny caps and gowns for the participants. No matter the age or size, students line up to receive their official diploma recognizing their achievement. Whether it is pre-school or a doctoral degree, graduation is acknowledged and celebrated. Congratulations to all the graduates!

Graduation is defined as the awards ceremony or the act of receiving a diploma or degree. From that perspective, graduation is an ending; a conclusion. It is the completion of a course of study. Graduation is the final act performed by a student at a school. You are a student. And then you are a graduate.

But graduation is also known as commencement…the time when something begins. As we graduate, we leave the past behind. As we commence, we move forward to the future. One door closes and another opens.

I think “graduates” should be known as “commencers”, since commence is a far more powerful word than graduate. Graduate is simply defined as the holder of a degree. Commence is defined as beginning.

Regardless as to whether you have been awarded a diploma or degree this graduation season, I invite you to commence living a more joyful life. You can award yourself with a master’s degree in life whenever you decide to do so. You can graduate into a more fulfilling way of being when you give yourself permission to put an end to what doesn’t serve you anymore. Commencement is a kickoff or a launch to a new way of life.

Maybe you’d like to give yourself a diploma for bravery and courage while fighting a life-threatening illness. Maybe you’d like to award yourself with a degree in financial management for successfully running your household on less income than you deserve and less than you need. Maybe you’d like to recognize your life’s achievement of being a successful mom or dad. You can even hold a commencement ceremony to celebrate your new beginning and the genesis of your success as you move forward into the future with excitement and purpose. Remember you are never too old to begin again.

Steve Jobs delivered many inspiring commencement speeches. In one of his last he said, “Your time is limited, don’t waste it living someone else’s life. Don’t be trapped by dogma, which is living the result of other people’s thinking. Don’t let the noise of other opinions drown your own inner voice. And most important, have the courage to follow your heart and intuition. They somehow already know what you truly want to become. Everything else is secondary.”

Every day you have the opportunity to begin again. Every day you have the ability to make a different choice. Every day is a commencement. Let the celebration begin!

 

 

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May 10 2016

Check Your Attitude

Category: ControlPatricia @ 7:01 pm

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Do you feel in control of your life? Or does it feel like everything is out of control? It can be scary when situations in life change and you’re not sure what to do next. When you’re doing something new and unfamiliar, you may be frightened until you know what to expect. If you want to feel more in control, check your attitude. Your attitude is the control center of your life. And your attitude is based on your thoughts and beliefs.

As human beings, we are programmed to consider new experiences with a certain amount of fear. We can feel uncomfortable. We want to know what to expect so we can feel comfortable; more in control of the situation. Your attitude about yourself and your abilities affects your expectations. Your attitude is your belief in yourself and is a reflection of your self-confidence. Your behavior is a reflection of your attitude. Your attitude is the way your think or feel about something. It is your view; the way you approach life. It is your personal perspective of the way things are…your story.

Remember that the new and unfamiliar future only exists in your thoughts. And you are in control of your thoughts. We are making it up as we go. We tell ourselves a story about what might happen. We base the story on what has happened in the past and our feelings about what has happened. Sometimes we tell ourselves a good story and we feel good. When we allow ourselves to imagine and experience a positive expectation, we benefit from those thoughts. We are more prepared and at ease in new situations. We feel more confident about our actions. We get to practice through visualization in our mind’s eye before we experience the reality. We get inspired to follow through on our goals when we get in touch with our feelings about the achievement of the goal or the end of the story.

Sometimes we tell ourselves a very bad story which makes us feel out of control. When you tell a bad story, you experience fear and anxiety about things which don’t even exist yet! When you’re worrying about the future, you are literally planning for things you don’t want to happen. All the time and energy you spend in this negative emotional state is working against you. You are literally creating your own worst fears. And your physical body is reacting to and suffering from those thoughts!

I want to remind you that you are always in control of your thoughts. You are making up the story…good or bad. You are consciously making a choice about which thoughts to focus upon. Why not spend your time and energy focusing on your desires instead of your fears? Imagine the best case scenario. Focus on what you want instead of what you don’t want! You want to be slim. You don’t want to be fat. You want to be prosperous. You don’t want to struggle financially. You want to be loveable. You don’t want to be alone. Just that shift in thinking will make a difference about how you feel. It will also make a difference in how you act and how you react. In that moment, you actively take part in the creation of your life. You take control of the situation. You create the story. And your attitude creates the happy ending!

 

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May 03 2016

Three Simple Rules

Category: ChoicesPatricia @ 9:38 am
Healthy Pleasure

 

We all have rules we live by. A rule is a regulation or a principle that governs conduct or behavior. There are specific rules to every sport or game. In baseball, three strikes and you are out. There are rules that govern driving. We all know that the rule is to stop at a stop sign. In All the Little Live Things, Wallace Stegner says,  says, “It is the beginning of wisdom when you recognize that the best you can do is choose which rules you want to live by, and it’s persistent and aggravated imbecility to pretend you can live without any.” Rules are a necessary part of life. They help us to feel safe. We know what to expect in a given situation based upon the accepted rules of the society or group.

I encourage everyone to follow three simple rules. Even though they are simple, sometimes they are hard to follow. When you break any one of these three rules, you suffer. You punish yourself. You are the authority who enforces the rules. You are the one who understands the rules of conduct for any activity in your life. You know the rules you follow when there is nobody watching. Author Robert Heinlein says, “I am free, no matter what rules surround me. If I find them tolerable, I tolerate them; if I find them too obnoxious, I break them. I am free because I know that I alone am morally responsible for everything I do.”

It’s a good idea to reconsider the rules you’ve been following. You may find that some of the rules are nothing more than old habits. You may want to consider adding some new rules to your life.  If no one has taught you any of these rules, or if someone has taught you a different rule that isn’t working for you; you may want to consider adopting my three simple rules. I know that you would benefit, so please give them a try.

1. Love Yourself. Loving yourself allows you to love others. It allows peace of mind and a sense of contentment. When you love yourself, you respect yourself; you respect your body and your life. You honor your thoughts and feelings and feel worthy of expressing yourself. When you love yourself, you are more understanding of your limitations and more aware of your strengths. Loving yourself allows you to love and connect with all of humanity. It enhances your compassion for others.

2. Accept Yourself. Accepting yourself as you are right now is empowering. Accepting yourself allows a sense of value and worth regardless of your size, age, weight or level of fitness; regardless of your job, your status, your level of education, your wealth. Accepting yourself allows you to celebrate the glorious and unique being that you are. It also allows you to be more accepting and tolerant of others.

3. Pleasure Yourself. Pleasuring yourself is an instinctive act. As human beings, our lives are based on a pain/pleasure reward system. We are programmed to seek out physical, sensual pleasure; whether through food, sunshine or sex, dancing, singing, and laughing. The more we experience pleasure, the more pleasure we can experience. Each time we experience pleasure, we literally create neural pathways which induce the pleasure response throughout our bodies. As we experience pleasure, within our brain we “click” our amygdala forward to the frontal lobes, which results in and reinforces more creative and imaginative thinking. Pleasure also produces the hormonal release of endorphins, creating a healthier body and a sense of well being.Following the rules can make your body, mind and spirit feel good. Each one of us must embrace the secret, private pleasures that feed our souls and enrich our lives. We must love ourselves enough to accept what gives us pleasure and actively seek it out. It’s simple.

 

 

 

 

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